Day One of Singles Tournament, Winding Down

Ok, NotBrent is now posting comments, and Brent is officially freaked out.  Fortunately it hasn't put him off his game.  He described Game 4 as "a pretty brutal beat-down, and I was doing the beating."  Ever the gentleman (cracker), he did add that it was a bad match-up for his opponent.

Random pic, but nice, yes?

Amusingly, Brent's third game was played on the same table as game 1.  I imagine he's getting tired of the Tatooine looking buildings.  Winning the third game put him on table 30-something for game 4.  Also amusing, Brent's opponents from game 1 and two 2 faced off in game 3.  I am curious to see where Brent lands when the dust settles.  People playing on the top five tables might be playing in the 20's and 30's in the next round.  I believe there are 2 games to be played tomorrow.  Possibly three.  Certain details just bore me.

Cliffsnotes:  My new hero, random observations on the Con, rumors, and a good pixblitz.

"I'm Bringing Nerdy Back"

Saw that on a T-shirt earlier.  Been B-boxing ever since.

Herr Fernseher here, Brent's acting assistant.  Well, I am actually finding myself hoping Brent does poorly in game three and four; if he is not competing as well as he hopes, then I might have a chance of talking him into finding the beer pong table here at the hotel later tonight.  I'd say my chances are 50/50.  Look and see:

Some competitors came hungry.  Apparently, Brent came thirsty.
One of the most amusing sights of the weekend was finding Brent pacing outside the locked doors of the hotel bar 10 minutes before they opened, occasionally stopping to peer longingly through the windows.  One would think I have a good chance of talking him into beer pong later tonight.  However...

Cliffsnotes:  Stay tuned!  After the break, a near rant, a couple of Strictly Average milestones, and a pixblitz!

Game 1 Results, WAR Games Con

Herr Fernseher here again, Brent's temporary lackey and correspondent in the field.  Turns out Brent played his first game with Kenny (president?) of 40k Wrecking Crew.  The couple times I stopped by their table, the tension seemed high, but Brent told me afterward it was a great, competitive game, which is what the Wrecking Crew pride themselves on.  Interestingly, Kenny is one of the few people I trusted yesterday, thanks to his purity seal.  I didn't see it on him today, so I kept my distance.

This guy's arm was as big as mine and Brent's put together, so I kept back, just in case Brent was pissing him off.
Cliffsnotes: results and a personal note on the current leader of the pack.  And your pixfix, of course.

Game 1, WAR Games Con: Sally Forth!

Herr Fernseher here, Brent's temporary manservant.  The "master" and his Demons are currently battling some good looking Blood Angels.  Perhaps he'll have pics for you later.  In the meanwhile, I have your pix fix.

Cliffsnotes:  Brent could get sued for using this term "Cliffsnotes" so liberally, but as his surly dogsbody, I say, "serves him right!"  Anyway, some cool pics and a word about words (how some gamers "talk funny.")
Attention hobbyists: the narrative gamers got some of the coolest terrain at WAR Games Con

WarGames Con: Day One

Okay folks; day one has come to an end.  Goatboy and I had a good run, ending up in 15th place out of... a bunch.  You go look at it!

CliffNotes: I ramble on in my tired way then show some pictures you don't care about.

I've got to say, so far the event is surpassing my already high expectations.  It's great to meet and yak with a bunch of people, putting faces with names and all that.

The actual event was a blast!  Everyone I've talked to had a great time, and by any measure it was a huge success. 


In our Cups

Okay, an hour and a half left in the doubles tournament.  There are 56 tables, and after two games Brent and Goatboy have earned their spot on table #4 with an overall score of 75.  The front-runner on table #1 has a score of 92.  Soon we will see who drinks from the victor's cup.

I wonder if Brent has noticed the Unicorn on table #2.  Unlike him, I believe.

What Is My Servant Up To?

This is Brent - actually Brent, not Not Brent, nor am I Herr Fernseher, my Indentured Servant for the nonce - to actually show you pictures.  I'm going to be punishing the Indentured Servant severely for making you wait for actual pictures!

Quick update, me and Goatboy are doing good.  Shouldn't that be we're "doing well?"  Yes, I think so, but don't be a dick.  Besides, maybe they really are Do-Gooders.  Let's observe them...biding our time...We won the first game and scored more points in the second, so I'm calling that a win.  43 points on the first game, 32 on the second.  Here are some pictures.

Your Man on the Scene, WAR Games Con

Brent's Man Friday here, with updates and highlights.  (Up-to-the-minute coverage?  Gimme a break.  I think I'm only typing 30 wpm on this tiny laptop.)  Despite my overbearing overlord, I am enjoying myself here at WAR Games Con.  (Brent thinks my breaking one of his casualty markers was an accident.) 

--This just in:  Strictly Average has been hijacked!  Despite Brent's desire to bring you the thrills of this Con as it unfolds, he seems to be enjoying himself too much to be bothered with even reading my posts, much less editing them.  Let the inmates riot!

I hope none of you will be too disappointed if things are A Little Above Average around here while Brent is distracted.  Maybe I'll change that blue background...what do you think?

Brent versus Not Brent at WAR Games Con 2010

Brent:  Hero or Madman?

          There are some who might worry (or in the case of the Master Manipulator (every store needs one) who hopes) that Brent is on the verge of madness.  Not Brent.  –I mean, that is to say, Brent is not mad! 

          Not Brent is a formidable opponent and may well outnumber Brent by a significant margin.  As you can see from diagram 1, Brent is surrounded.  While many people in the photo are not the Not Brent, any of them could be a potential Not Brent.  At first, like you, I just assumed that Brent was paranoid with delusions of grandeur.  Now I am beginning to wonder.

 Diagram 1.  I trust Brent.  No, stop looking at Goatboy's shoulder; I'm pointing at Brent's head. I also trust the two dudes in the foreground because they are wearing purity seals.  Everyone else is suspect though.  Note: the faces have been obscured to protect the innocent and the suspect alike. 

Welcome to WarGames Con

Herr Fernseher here at WarGames Con. I’ve indentured myself to Brent for free passage to what is proving to be for me a New World of gaming. I’ve never been to a gaming event of this magnitude. It’s a large group. A couple hundred guys, a handful of girls. Even accounting for the fact that this is essentially a room full of guys, there are still a lot more beards than usual. And pants with cargo pockets. There are a few sports jerseys, a few comic T-shirts. A preponderance of the gamer’s physique. Across the conference room , I cannot make out the words, but I see the Old English font on several T-shirts. Even an honest-to-God Christian T-shirt. Oh, wait. Jesus has a word balloon: “Don’t be a dick”? Well…that’s a reasonable translation I guess.

 Here I am giving my right arm to keep some guy's ass out of the frame...

Energy levels are high here before the kickoff event for the conference, the doubles tournament.


WarGames Con Quickie...

Posted by Picasa
Elle-Drag, her Warlocks, and a few Fire Dragons
This is me, messing with Picasa.  I'm taking my setup to BoLSCon - er, sorry: WarGames Con so I can bring you multiple updates each day.

Why am I messing with Picasa?  I'm trying to make it easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy for my Indentured Servant, the Blogger Formally Known as Herr Fernseher.

Here's the group shot Mags wanted.  I've already taken down my camera equipment for transport, so this isn't the world's greatest shot.

See what kind of snob the Master Manipulator (every store needs one) has turned me into?

More updates soon - Brent

Who's My New Team Tournament Partner?

Well, here's a hint:


The Mighty Footdar Team... No More

Bloggerfester said...

Does this mean what I think it means?

No footdar pairs?

To which I, your hero, replied:

Nope, no Footdar. :(

Fritz contacted me earlier today but I didn't want to break the news - I wasn't sure it was mine to tell.

Something serious and unavoidable has come up, and Jawa and Fritz can't make BoLSCon.

I wish Fritz and his family all the best.  I hope everything is okay.  Family comes first.

My new Team Tournament partner is...


Bedtime - more tomorrow.

They're Not Exodites

Nope.  Everyone who has ever converted Eldar has come out with Exodites, so I went a different route.  I tried to portray a Craftworld that's fallen into the grip of Slaanesh.

(As an aside, check out Blood of Kittens today for my article on Proxies Vs Counts-As.  It may be a not-so-subtle snub at the team of Goatboy and Jawaballs.)

Check out yesterday's post for the army, but here's a Storm Guardian and a Dark Reaper Exarch.

(Click on the pictures for a larger view.)


The Not-So-Super-Secret Eldar Team Tournament Army...

...for BoLSCon 2010.

This is literally the best army I can create right now.  I hope you dig it.  EDIT: Yes, it's a Footdar.  That's what me and Fritz wanted!  I don't mean an optimized list, I mean a converted and painted army.

The Master Manipulator (every store needs one) and his stupid success...

The Master Manipulator managed to make the Tuesday Top Ten.  He's had a blog for like two minutes now.

I've decided I no longer like him.  Absolutely positively don't support his blog.  I'm not even going to link to it.

Here you go:  CLICK HERE.

In other news, I finished the Not-So-Super-Secret-BoLSCon army about an hour ago.  I'm taking pictures now, so it should be posted by 6pm.


WarGames Con Objective Markers, Redux

I just shot off this week's article to TastyTaste, which didn't take too long since it was actually the article I tried to get published on Bell of Lost Souls.

CliffNotes: The WarGames Con objective markers are re-posted with better quality pictures.

But Big Red hates me and wouldn't respond.  If you're mildly OCD, there's nothing worse than being ignored.  Yup, it drove me a bit nuts, but no matter.  I found a home with Blood of Kittens, where I'm hoping to build a following over the next year with my On Blogging Series.

Birthdays and BoLSCon

It was my birthday yesterday, but I've decided I'm not middle-aged for another 5 years or so.

CliffNotes: It's short. Read it or not, your option.

As an aside, the Master Manipulator (every store needs one) also celebrated his birthday this weekend, though I believe his birthday is today, the 26th. I never realized he was a Leo: that explains a lot. He's got one of those great wives who make more money than their husbands but love them enough to buy them expensive stuff.  Check out his present here, and support his blog if you have a mind to.  My hope is he's not a flash in the pan, so encourage his ADD already.

How does this relate to BoLSCon - er, sorry: WarGAmes Con?  Because I've got a pretty great family too.  My wife purchased my ticket and hotel room for this weekend's event months ago and yesterday mom gave me a new Gucci wallet stuffed with beer money for the trip.  (Her hope is I'll finish my graduate degree and decide to actually make money again.  I've been in my post-adolescent shorts and sandals phase since my ex-partner cleaned out my bank account and made an irony out of a decade of hard work and savings.)

Okay, the picture... what's everyone's thoughts on basing?  I used to keep the edge of the base black but transitioned to a 'painting it brown' period a few years ago.  Based on Lauby's advice, I went back to black for the Not-So-Super-Secret Army, which you'll see tomorrow.  I think the black edging makes the sand and flocking pop.

The MM(esno) has a process he shared with me this weekend, but I'll let him share it on his blog.  What does everyone out there prefer?


WarGames Con 2010, Daemons Army

CliffNotes: Pictures of my 2000pt Daemons army for the 40K tournament this week.

I sent my Eldar Team Tournament list and my Daemons 40K track list in a few weeks back for verification by the TO's.  JWolf sent the following reply, which I found truly hilarious:

Proof of Project Mayhem!!

My brent@strictlyaverage.com email address blew up yesterday with people sending me proof of something that has, until now, only been a rumor.

Today, we ask then answer the question: Does Project Mayhem exist?  Is Dethtron walking at the head of a group of internet anarchists?  That's two questions.

CliffNotes: Today, we ask then answer the question: Does Project Mayhem exist?

Don't click to read more unless you're ready for the awful truth.


Tomb Kings

I don't think I'm going to resist being able to build and play Tomb Kings in our local Warhammer Build Event.

CliffNotes: A picture of my Tomb Prince and Hierophant.

(An older paint job, but I doubt I'll change it, other than to perhaps add hieroglyphics on the robe or something.)

Mishspellingg Much?

Ha ha ha!  No, honest - it was a joke!  See, I deliberately misspelled a word I saw misspelled in the article... no, really!! 

Yup, that was it.  Honest.

What do you mean, "Thou doth protest too much?"

A simple wink would have gone farther to convince Ye Ol' Blogosphere the choice was deliberate and not a gut-wrenching 'DOH!'  Therein lies the art of lying convincingly!


The Ugly, Ugly History of Not Brent

So Part III of On Blogging is up on Blood of Kittens, and if you didn't know by now the interview was with Dethtron from SELF-EDIT *masculine reproductive equipment* Move.

You can find the link here.

CliffNotes: A possibly possible version of the origins of Not Brent.  Oh, and and in the spirit of duality that is Brent / Not Brent, there are two pictures of quite possibly the coolest stolen content conversion ever.

Here's an interview question that didn't end up in the final article...

My therapist wants to know why you torment me with Not Brent.  What is that and how did it get started?


Whatcha Doin'?

Today I'm working on the Not-So-Super-Secret-BoLSCon Army.  I'm down to the last squad and the Eldrad-clone.  Hopefully I'll finish today.

CliffNotes: Brent steals his friends' content 'cause he's painting today.

Let's look at what my friends are doing today, starting with the Master Manipulator (every store needs one).  He's considering what to do with his Warhammer Orcs at 1250.

(Click for a closer look.)


What Will Characters Look Like...

...in Warhammer 8th Edition? I ask this question as I continue my study of the bible, not to be confused with the Bible...  We get the point - move on.

CliffNotes: a short post, foreshadowing a discussion point to be explored over the next few months.


WarGames Con Test Game

In the midst of a sea of enthusiasm for Warhammer, my boy Big Whit asked me last week if I wanted a game of 40K.  I accepted, since BoLSCon WarGames Con is right around the corner.  It's also useful for me to keep the rules straight, since I'm famous for mixing rules if we're playing one too many different games.

I blame it on too many drugs in the 60's.

No, I wasn't born in the 60's.  Nor do illegal drugs pass these lips.  What?  No, I don't shoot up!  Suspicious much?  Let's move on.

CliffNotes:  There is a game of 40K and a bunch of pictures.

This is a straight game.  He brought the army he's most comfortable with, his Chaos Space Marines, and we rolled for the scenario, which turned out to be Seize Ground Dawn of War.


The Master Manipulator (every store needs one)

I started this blog a bit over a year ago to inspire myself to write, to paint, and to focus.  That's no exaggeration, but obviously it requires a bit more explanation than I'm going to give it right now.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  Today, it's fair to say I've had some success, though it's also fair to say I went about it all wrong and would have done much, much better if I knew then what I know now.  That's part of the reason I've set out to write my series on Blood of Kittens called On Blogging, to help new bloggers understand the environment - but that's neither here nor there.

CliffNotes: the MM(esno) is starting his own blog, which will focus on painting... check it out here!

The Master Manipulator (every store needs one) has watched this blog for some time - how long, I'm not sure.  I didn't actually tell my friends what I was doing, nor did I ask them to read it.  I think that's a bit like become a salesman to sell Amway to your friends and family.  I figured if they were interested, they'd read it.

Part of Strictly Average has always been the running gags, such as...

Daemons: Ready for BoLSCon 2010...

...er, WarGames Con 2010.  (I'm so confused.)  Also I've got some tips for you tournament goers out there.

Let's take a look at the list...

The ETC... and Only ONE Firepoint??

Here's a quick post today, which I'll probably post over later.

CliffNotes: the ETC CSM armies all look alike.  I ask the question why? then don't bother to answer it fully.

I've been doing for-fun research on the European Team Championships (there are lots of internet resources if you're at all interested... HERE is a fun one to search through) and I've had a few thoughts on the way they build their lists.  Before we do that, let's do this...

On the eve of the 2010 40k ETC, the mighty Team America will gorge heavily on a War-meal of USDA approved Mad-Cow-free Beef, Freedom Fries, and Kentucky Bourbon. We will snuggle up underneath Ol' Glory bedsheets and go to sleep, content in the knowledge that like our forefathers before us we are in the business of winning war(hammer) and business is good.


Review: Warhammer Templates and Tools

Okay, folks, let's take a brief look at the goodies you MUST can purchase to supplement your games of Warhammer 8th Edition.

CliffNotes: we're going to look at or talk about the templates, the Engineer's Kit, the tokens - 3 different packs, there - as well as the dice and the card packs.

Before we get there, I just have to say something about the book.  I love it.  I really do - it's like my Warhammer Bible bible.  I like the feel of it, the weight, the formatting and the content - everything - and I didn't think I would.  As far as I'm concerned, it's a must have... but I didn't feel that way at first.  Frankly, I purchased it because I 'had' to, since I simply couldn't wait until the boxed set.  Evil Homer was telling anyone who'd listen that he'd never purchase the thing, and I think he was the first to do so.  For whatever reason, GW hit a home run with this book.  Trust me, if you haven't purchased it, you're going to want to.

I'm not usually mushy about my gaming products, but the reason I'm excited about these products is the topnotch combination of form and function.  I enjoy the weight and the texture, the art is elegant and appropriate, and each product serves a purpose and does it well.

Let's look at some pretty pictures...


Hailed Vs Hated, A Review

I've been writing a series of articles on Blood of Kittens called On Blogging.  The series is in its infancy, but already two articles are published (Part II went up last night), two more are in the works, and I've barely scratched the surface of the content I'm planning.


Warhammer: Beastmen Vs Vampire Counts

Well, other than my attempt to save the world with my article, It's Not a Rodney King World, things have been a bit slow here at Strictly Average.  I've been working on my series over at Blood of Kittens called On Blogging, the first of which published last week and the second of which is in TastyTaste's hot little hands.  The third and fourth installments are actually already written, I'm just waiting for the questionnaires to return.


It's Not a Rodney King World

I'm not really sure what to say today.  I'm a bit maudlin about the interwebz internecine infighting.  It doesn't usually get me down because I attempt to foster within myself a spirit of optimism.  I'm a grad student now, a Social Worker shooting for my terminal degree... and not because I want to help people.


Beastmen vs. Orcs

After a few weeks of games where we just put the new system through its paces, we've now reached a point of familiarity and are able to tighten up our tactics, able to play to win!

Still, and I've said this several times, though many great analysts out there have made some comments and predictions, everybody is still a long way from understanding how the game will ultimately shake out.  What's that mean?  It means we're a long way from canned armies, from knowing what's 'best.'  It's a fun time to be playing Warhammer!

Frankly, I'm not sure I'll see another holiday from the normal like this for many years to come.  GW managed to turn the paradigm on its head and shake everyone up.  Not easy to do.

Moving on, here's a game between my Beastmen and the Master Manipulator (every store needs one)'s Orcs and Goblins.


Digital Concepts Light Studio: A Must Have

I'm the proud owner of a Digital Concepts Light Studio, and I've got to say very few things have made me this excited.


Beastmen vs Skaven: Down 'n Dirty

I got to play some Warhammer last night and some Warhammer today and some more Warhammer today... it's a glut I tell you, a glut!

My army today was much, much better than the cra... *SELF-EDIT*

What was that?

Holy Cra... *SELF-EDIT*

Bull Sh... *SELF-EDIT*

F... *SELF-EDIT*  (I didn't get that far with that one.)

Okay, I see where this is going.  I don't want to see what happens after the red warning, so let's move on.


How Do the FAQ's Affect Me?

Quick post, and I'll probably post over it later with a battle report, Beastmen vs Vampire Counts.

(Reminder: check out Blood of Kittens for Part I of On Blogging.)

So as everyone is aware the FAQ's are out.  I'm not going to comment on those for armies I don't use - I'll leave that to others.  I play Beastmen and Tomb Kings, so let's take a brief look for initial thoughts.


You'd better believe I'm going to have a scouting chariot.  I'm going to love my scouting chariot.  I'm going to hug it and squeeze it and call it George.


Warhammer 8th: Still in the Kiddy Pool

Good little article on Bell today, posted by HERO.  Yet another author who ain't me - it's a kick in the groin I tell you!  Since I'm busy today with finishing up the article for BoK, not to mention having to work this afternoon, I've decided to steal my comment and re-post it here.  How's that for lazy?

 From Little Barrera's army...


New Banner by Goatboy...

...and I couldn't be more excited!  For those of you who don't know, Goatboy is a ninja-gansta-artist... dude... type... person... guy...

He is all those things and more and right now he's working dirt cheap.  I paid 25 bucks for the banner.  You heard right, just 25 bucks.  I saw the art he'd done for the Green Blowfly and knew I'd I had to have something similar.  I shot off my money on Friday night and here it is, Wednesday, and it's up!


Shooting Miniatures: Lightbox or No?

Okay, we've got one miniature and two different ways of taking its picture.  Say cheese!  The model in question is a Centurius Clone, painted by the Master Manipulator (every store needs one).  He shot pictures for Dakka Dakka using advanced techniques (...can you say 'the right way?'  I knew you could!); that is, a proper background and light source.  Then you've got my typical point and click...

Which is, by the way, the way I've taken every picture for every model that's ever appeared on this site.  Assuming it wasn't one I borrowed (...can you say 'stole,' boys and girls?  I knew you could!).


Policing the Language

You mean people read this stuff?

That's a bit of an evasion.  I have Analytics - I know exactly how many unique readers and hits I get per post.  That's an important part of blogging, and Strictly Average is a moderately successful hobby blog, but it isn't close to being the giant From The Warp is.

How's that for a clumsy introduction?  This story began and ended in the last twelve hours but will ultimately change how I self-edit.  The following is a series of email exchanges between me and Ron, the aforementioned giant.  A la Dethtron/the King/Kirbs, any additional comments I have will be in green.

Cliffnotes version:  I'm going to keep the language clean in the main posts on Strictly Average.  My use of adult language will remain on sites that allow it.


Brent said:
Hey Ron,

Warhammer: Moving Skirmishers

So, moving skirmishers is a bit different.  It seems needlessly complicated, but that's probably because it's new.  We're using the cork to illustrate the movement.


Unicorns Don't Exist... Still

Okay, so this is Part the Second.  Jennifer was kind enough to drop a comment.  Let's play, 'Be she female gamer or be she Unicorn?'

In true Dethtron style, my comments are in blue, so you'll have to highlight it to read it.  I didn't want it interfering with her letter.

Jennifer said:


Unicorns Don't Exist... EDITED

One day, when I was stalking Jawaballs - and yes, many of my stories start that way now, just like many of my stories used to start with, "I was drunk in a bar somewhere..." when I was in my twenties - I heard described the mythic Unicorn...


Tau Online: Meltdown, and One Monumental Jerk

It was vaguely interesting, but not much more than that.

I went to Tau Online for the first time today, just to see if there was more to the story, an official word or something.  I repeat, I've never been there before; as a general rule, I don't care much for forums.  I have an account at the BoLS Lounge, but that's it.  I don't think my number of posts has hit double-digits.

So I get there and start reading the first thread.  The meltdown was mildly amusing.  The ranting began, followed by the anger.

Then I was assaulted by a screen full of the most disgusting, perverted images I've ever had the misfortune to see in one place. 

Beastmen Lords and Heroes...

...and a Shaggoth that won't stop hanging around.

(Before we get started, make sure you check out Blood of Kittens today for the real story of Hard Boyz 2009.)

(Also, if you're not reading Lauby Industries, start checking it out!  I owe him a link or three for all the help he's given me with my Not-So-Secret-BoLSCon-Oops-WarGamesCon-Army.)


Blast from the Past, Ork Style

What's there to say?  This isn't something that will see use anytime soon but I used to use it quite a bit back in the day. 

Avoiding Complacency

I've been feeling rather blah lately, for a wide variety of reasons I won't bore you with.

I've done quite a bit... but I can't show you yet, so I may be making it up.  I've completed the first squad of ten, and since I tackled the hardest first the rest should be a breeze.  I'm also working on the display board - and trying to capture the essence of Fritz isn't easy.

(A new favorite!) Anon: I haven’t even bothered playing a game of 6th yet, cause I have read the rules, and actually understand how they interact with units. I know my armies no longer function how they should, and so I need to change them.

Strictly Average: 'cause 6-inches is all you get.

Stalking Jawaballs since 2009.

Jawaballs: "My butt just tightened up."

Brent, preferred 2-to-1 over Not Brent in a recent, scientific poll.

Brent: emptied the Kool Aid and DRINKING YOUR MILKSHAKE with an extra-long straw.

Unicorns don't exist.

Home of the Stormbuster, the Dyson Pattern Storm Raven.

I'm a comment whore and this whore is getting no play.

Not Brent hurts Brent's feelings.

I think, therefore I blog.

"You should stop writing for everyone else and worry about your crappy blog." - Anon.

Not Brent has been spotted lurking around with a green marker.

He's not like a bad guy from a cartoon, all devious but never quite evil, Not Brent is bad beans, man, bad beans.

Dethtron: "Again I feel obliged to remind you that trying to sound smart only works if you are."

MVB: "I am not one to join the unwashed masses of self-titled 40k experts out there distributing advice from their blogs about exactly how your list should be built..."

Shiner Bock on tap: that's how I choose hotels.

Strictly Average: The Home of Hugs and Gropings.

Don't feed the trolls!

MoD: "Welcome to Brent's head."

Competitive is Consistent.

Dethtron: "...you could use that extra time to figure out a way to get your panties unbunched and perform a sandectomy on your vagina."

Dethtron: “When calling someone an idiot, it's generally best to avoid making grammatical mistakes.”

Warboss Stalin: "You know, if it actually WAS funny, maybe I wouldn't mind."

Mike Brandt: "It's not a successful bachelor party if you don't misplace someone".

"The Master Manipulator (every store needs one): "...now, enough stroking."

Kirby: "I don't know about gropings. Seriously, Brent, keep it in the pants, please."

Loquacious: "No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get Hugs & Gropings or Stalks Jawaballs into Brent's little tribute."

Captain Kellen: "I rate this article a Brent on the Faith Hill to Nancy Pelosi scale!"

Drathmere: "Come for the balls, stay for the Brent? Kind of disturbing, man."

Go no further, lest thee see something thine eyes would fain look past!

Isabelle: "So, thank you for supporting your local and not so local unicorns. A noble gesture like that can show some scared kids out there that they don't have to hide from everyone and it's ok to be who they really are."

There is nothing more interesting than We The People... in all our beautiful, ugly glory!

On Internet Advice: You see, I have an almost religious belief that's it's a huge, colossal waste of time.

...I think I'll call it the Gun Shy Pattern Stormbuster, because after the Internet destroyed my first humble effort, I find I'm a bit worried about the reaction to this one.

Lauby: "Is it left over from that time you thought that you could just complete step one 12 times to meet the mandates of that court order?"

Not Brent: "I guess we'll have to read on and find out. Signed, Not Brent. Especially today."

Cynthia Davis: "I think the scrolling text is from Glen Beck's new book."

Grimaldi: "Spamming certain units creates interesting possibilities but also fatal weaknesses."

Purgatus: "Math can inform decisions. It cannot make decisions."

Thoughts? Comments? Hugs and gropings?

You'd be that much quicker to figure out what I mean when I refer to a Unicorn if I covered it in a rainbow flag.

SinSynn: (To Brent) "Curse you and your insidious influence on the internets..."

Dave G (N++): "You know you're an internet celebrity when your following is more akin to tabloids."

I prefer the term Internet Personality (or IP) myself, seeing as how I coined it.

Lauby: "Your attempt to humanize him as failed. I feel nothing but scorn for his beard - it's like a warcrime or something."

BBF: "I've always thought you are a good player but I finally figured out that you are a great player. It's hard to see sometimes because your personality is engaging, sincere and quite charming - to me that is kind of a rare combination."

'Clearly cheating?' I didn't misspeak: you jumped to conclusions. If you'd like to apologize I'll be happy to send you an autographed picture of my ass.


I thought I was doing alright before I realized I was losing.

Age and treachery beats youth and vigor every time.

Popular Posts