5.06.2011

Evil Homer: The Ruiner of Fun

Evil Homer; my nemesis.

Evil Homer; the man, the myth, the legend (in my digital, green with envy mind, in any case)...

...and on Saturday last week, he became The Ruiner of Fun.

...

What?  Details?

Pish and tosh.  I suppose so.

What does this picture have to do with the article?  Not much, I suppose, but I'm not sure this article has much to do with anything.  I took my long-suffering wife to Dallas two weeks ago to see the new Cabaret at the Wyly, and this is the suite we stayed in.  As you can see, I never get very far from Strictly Average.

I suppose I'd better back off the 'Evil Homer is bad' motif I've played with thus far, because the incident I'm about to relate certainly wasn't his fault.  In fact, I'm glad it was him that Ruined My Fun.

Don't go feeling sorry for Evil Homer.  He's not the type to get butt-hurt over being the Ruiner of Fun, assuming Brent meant it directly rather than indirectly.

...

He's wasting an awful lot of time.  I guess this bugs him.

Mmm... I lost some time somewhere.  Anyway, I was playing my Bugs! in the local 1500 point tournament.  Work was a *SELF-EDIT* that day, and I'd already had to make one trip out to the hospital; I was running short on time, so I grabbed an army list I'd used two weeks ago and threw the models in my box (you can read that as 'placed them gently in the box,' thank you) and ran out the door.

Consequently, I was playing a Bugs! list with three Carnibugs in a brood, backed up by a Tervibug who gave them Feel No Pain.  The list also included three 10-strong units of GeneBugs with a Broodbug each and some flying Rippers to top it all off.


It was a sucky list, I know, but I've always in the past been able to play a sucky list and still have fun.  I was under no illusions about winning the tournament, but I thought I'd at least have fun.

See where this is going?

I played a new player in Round 1, so the game was never in doubt.  I basically put on my 'help the new player' hat and walked him gently through the game.  The max points I earned was less about my army and more about my opponent - no shame on him, of course.  We were all new once.

Then I played Evil Homer and his Mech Dark Eldar army.  I new I wouldn't win, but I thought I'd at least make it a fight, right?

Right?

...

Well, *SELF-EDIT*!  If all of you knew that, why didn't someone tell me?

For those three players who may not understand what Brent is referring to, suffice it to say he should have known what everyone else already does... lopsided ass-kickings are never fun.

I had to learn the hard way that lopsided ass-kickings are never fun.  Er, deja vu, anyone?

It wasn't that it wasn't fun, it's that it SO WASN'T FUN... you dig?

Despite being The Ruiner of Fun, I'm glad I played Evil Homer, because he didn't a) try to make something that wasn't fun, fun, or b) patronize me about it.  He threw down the quickest beating he could.  It was like ripping the band-aid off a scab partially covering an open wound.

It sucked then it still sucked, but at least it was fast.  I really appreciated that.

So where do I go from here?

Well, I finally learned a lesson I should have learned a long time ago - a lesson I suspect the locals have been trying to impart for a long, long time: I can't always get by playing grossly inferior lists and count on my skill to get me through.

The game has moved on.  So should I.

Not sure where that leaves me with my Bugs! army.  I'm not giving up just yet, but at the same time I'm not convinced I'll be ready to play them at a high level this tournament season.

I may go with Plan B... not that I can quite remember what Plan B is...

Stop! Vile, evil plan in the works!

Plan B is Secret, and Evil.  It's so secret, so vile, Brent is not actually privy to the details.  In fact, it's my plan.  It's Not Brent's Secret, Evil Plan B.


It's a disgusting beatstick of an army... so I need to make some purchases.  More to come.

I have a headache now - not sure why...

9 comments:

Evil Homer said...

I need a t-shirt that Ruiner of Fun

inquisitor_dunn said...

A$$ beatings are never fun but they are useful. They keep the ego in check and help make your list better. (cause lets face it, you never take the same army list after a good beating)

Good to hear he was "professional" about it. Nothing worse than someone thinking they are the greatest player ever, when it is simply a bad list or matchup.

Atrocity said...

I'm pretty sure that these types of games are everyone's least favorite.

At a recent tournament I was on the correct side of the beating stick (if it can be called that). The game was clearly over and just seemed to drag on and on. The inevitability seems to make time drag slower. You just hope that it ends swiftly, either you have an awesome set of rolls or he just concedes.

Although I'm really not sure who it's worse for. When I'm the beatee I still cling to this naïve hope that "Maybe I'll get a fantastic string of rolls and pull this one out." More often than not you don't turn it around.

I hate these games, I'm not having fun and nor is my opponent. 100 times out of 100 I'd rather lose a close game than play in a game where someone gets waxed like that.

Krisken said...

Time to play counts-as Space Wolves.

I keed, I keed!

Von said...

I hate being on either side of those games. They're... accidental wins, I suppose: victories for which no kudos can be legitimately claimed because honestly, it was decided by factors extraneous to skill (like "having two Incorporeal models when your opponent has one model that can hurt them, and there are two objectives that need to be camped on for the win").

Rodney said...

Don't give up on the bugs!

Brent said...

No, I'm not giving up on the Bugs!, I just need to get serious about my take on them.

I'm working on a new, more realistic take on them right now.

BdaGamer said...

Brent, I would not make too many changes to the list. I have made some fun list in the past and have taken horrible beatings. One list that springs to mind *shudder* is a 1000 point Eldar list with 30 models, with no weapons over 36" range.

I do agree it is hard to not loose ones spirit after taking a one sided thrashing. Play the list a few more times before you make any changes.

unrelated - word verification is sactard

cirno-chan said...

I prefer spamming the f*ck out of my opponent, if eveyone dies, but I spammed, I had fun

(A new favorite!) Anon: I haven’t even bothered playing a game of 6th yet, cause I have read the rules, and actually understand how they interact with units. I know my armies no longer function how they should, and so I need to change them.

Strictly Average: 'cause 6-inches is all you get.

Stalking Jawaballs since 2009.

Jawaballs: "My butt just tightened up."

Brent, preferred 2-to-1 over Not Brent in a recent, scientific poll.

Brent: emptied the Kool Aid and DRINKING YOUR MILKSHAKE with an extra-long straw.

Unicorns don't exist.

Home of the Stormbuster, the Dyson Pattern Storm Raven.

I'm a comment whore and this whore is getting no play.

Not Brent hurts Brent's feelings.

I think, therefore I blog.

"You should stop writing for everyone else and worry about your crappy blog." - Anon.

Not Brent has been spotted lurking around with a green marker.

He's not like a bad guy from a cartoon, all devious but never quite evil, Not Brent is bad beans, man, bad beans.

Dethtron: "Again I feel obliged to remind you that trying to sound smart only works if you are."

MVB: "I am not one to join the unwashed masses of self-titled 40k experts out there distributing advice from their blogs about exactly how your list should be built..."

Shiner Bock on tap: that's how I choose hotels.

Strictly Average: The Home of Hugs and Gropings.

Don't feed the trolls!

MoD: "Welcome to Brent's head."

Competitive is Consistent.

Dethtron: "...you could use that extra time to figure out a way to get your panties unbunched and perform a sandectomy on your vagina."

Dethtron: “When calling someone an idiot, it's generally best to avoid making grammatical mistakes.”

Warboss Stalin: "You know, if it actually WAS funny, maybe I wouldn't mind."

Mike Brandt: "It's not a successful bachelor party if you don't misplace someone".

"The Master Manipulator (every store needs one): "...now, enough stroking."

Kirby: "I don't know about gropings. Seriously, Brent, keep it in the pants, please."

Loquacious: "No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get Hugs & Gropings or Stalks Jawaballs into Brent's little tribute."

Captain Kellen: "I rate this article a Brent on the Faith Hill to Nancy Pelosi scale!"

Drathmere: "Come for the balls, stay for the Brent? Kind of disturbing, man."

Go no further, lest thee see something thine eyes would fain look past!

Isabelle: "So, thank you for supporting your local and not so local unicorns. A noble gesture like that can show some scared kids out there that they don't have to hide from everyone and it's ok to be who they really are."

There is nothing more interesting than We The People... in all our beautiful, ugly glory!

On Internet Advice: You see, I have an almost religious belief that's it's a huge, colossal waste of time.

...I think I'll call it the Gun Shy Pattern Stormbuster, because after the Internet destroyed my first humble effort, I find I'm a bit worried about the reaction to this one.

Lauby: "Is it left over from that time you thought that you could just complete step one 12 times to meet the mandates of that court order?"

Not Brent: "I guess we'll have to read on and find out. Signed, Not Brent. Especially today."

Cynthia Davis: "I think the scrolling text is from Glen Beck's new book."

Grimaldi: "Spamming certain units creates interesting possibilities but also fatal weaknesses."

Purgatus: "Math can inform decisions. It cannot make decisions."

Thoughts? Comments? Hugs and gropings?

You'd be that much quicker to figure out what I mean when I refer to a Unicorn if I covered it in a rainbow flag.

SinSynn: (To Brent) "Curse you and your insidious influence on the internets..."

Dave G (N++): "You know you're an internet celebrity when your following is more akin to tabloids."

I prefer the term Internet Personality (or IP) myself, seeing as how I coined it.

Lauby: "Your attempt to humanize him as failed. I feel nothing but scorn for his beard - it's like a warcrime or something."

BBF: "I've always thought you are a good player but I finally figured out that you are a great player. It's hard to see sometimes because your personality is engaging, sincere and quite charming - to me that is kind of a rare combination."

'Clearly cheating?' I didn't misspeak: you jumped to conclusions. If you'd like to apologize I'll be happy to send you an autographed picture of my ass.

Ass.

I thought I was doing alright before I realized I was losing.

Age and treachery beats youth and vigor every time.

Popular Posts